Having different family situations these days seems common. So, my story may sound somewhat familiar to some of you or you might say to yourself... SAY WHAT? Until I was 19 years old I had 3 siblings. One, is my full sister and then I have two half sisters from my Dad. But then a wrinkle happened in my life. My dad was dying of Cancer and only had a short time left to live. My oldest sister had apparently known of a child who was given up for adoption who was actually my full brother. Wait..... My full brother and I have no clue about him? Yes.
My brother, who was 9 years older than me, had been given up for adoption before my parents were married. Then through circumstance, they ended up getting married and having my sister and I. But, I had no idea that I had an older brother out there. So with my father on limited time, my oldest sister decided to reach out and try to find my brother. I was at a time in my life where I was worried about stupid 19 year old things and I tried to drain out the fact that my dad was dying. So all of this was a crazy to me.
So the day came when my brother, who had lived in Nebraska, came to Iowa to meet not only his dying real father, his real mom, but also 4 siblings. All of whom he had never met. I'm sure it was a lot for him to process as well, but the fact that he came and met his dad and all of us, told me something about his character. If I was in his situation I don't know how I would of reacted, to be quite honest.
We headed to the hotel to meet him before he would come and meet my father for the first time. I remember how nervous I was to meet my brother for the first time. I know it was probably harder for him, but I know how I felt at the time. The first thing I thought when I saw him was "This is not my brother." He looked nothing like me or anyone in my family. Was there a mistake? But then I met him. I remember thinking to myself this is the nicest guy. He took my mom, my siblings and I all in and was wonderful about it all. Then he went to meet my dad who was confined to bed and ready to go at any moment. My dad at the time wasn't really with it as he was so drugged up and in pain. But my dad got his time with his son he had never met.
Then it was over. I don't honestly remember how long after that, but a very short time after my dad passed away. It was almost like he was waiting to meet his son before he left us. It was seriously an awesome experience that my brother took the chance, met his family and helped us say goodbye to my dad.
So in my situation would I say meeting an adopted sibling is a good thing? ABSOLUTELY. I ended up knowing my brother for 25 years and then he passed away. Over those 25 years we would get together, he would spend time with my family and felt like a brother I always had. Would I recommend meeting your adopted family member? Yes. I know in many situations kids are given up for bad reasons. But if a family member is taking the time to try to track you down, they are probably doing it for good reasons.
Moral of this whole story: Enjoy your time with your family.
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