The Office Christmas Party

Every year around this time, offices around the country begin to have their holiday Christmas parties. The parties give us a chance to let our hair down and have a few drinks with our co-workers. Of course this year my office is doing nothing. PLUS.... We don't get a bonus. So whoever said County Government employees have it easy... Think twice.

But thanks to my wife this year and her work I get a free steak and lobster dinner, PLUS.....Free Drinks and she gets a bonus! YES!.

So for all of you attending office parties this year, here are the Top Ten Signs You're at a Bad Office Christmas Party (according to David Letterman)

10. Eggnog smells suspiciously like Liquid Paper.
9. Anyone caught under mistletoe gets choked by Latrell Sprewell.
8. Because of "corporate downsizing," Santa is only 120 pounds.
7. Only food available is something called "reindeer kebabs."
6. Last time you saw this much sucking up was on the Tommy Lee-Pamela Anderson videotape.
5. Christmas tree is just a fat intern in a green sweater.
4. For the 16th year in a row, the Canadian band leader has passed out in the eggnog.
3. Thanks to the alcohol-free punch, not a single butt gets photocopied.
2. Boss offers to give you a raise, and he's not talking about money.
1. It's held every year on July 23rd.